A wise man was a participating in a conversation. He contributed by telling the group a joke. All those present were highly amused and appreciated the humour. After a while, he narrated the joke again. This time the response was more tempered. After some time, he said it the third time and it evoked barely any response. When he tried repeating it a fourth time, a member of the group burst out: “Why are you repeating the joke so many times? It’s no longer amusing; it’s irritating!” The wise man responded: “If repeating a joke ceases to amuse after a few times, then how do we carry on with repeated remembrance of painful stories?”The way a person deals with unpleasantness in the past influences largely, his attitude and approach to dealing with the present.
Carrying excess emotional baggage does not augur well; it could affect your self-esteem. You might get convinced that you are at the root of all the misfortunes that have befallen you and will mope and indulge in an unforgiving criticism of yourself. The already low levels of self esteem could ebb further and make you cynical. Embers of unpleasant memories get fanned by self-pity and self-criticism and so the flame of sorrow is kept alive. It is akin to being a jury at one’s own trial and about being obsessive about fixing the blame rather than the problem.
Moving on with life after an unsavoury incident requires one to view it as just one among many events and incidents in one’s life. Que sera sera -- whatever will be will be. Reminiscing and reacting to the past is as futile as attempting to resuscitate a corpse. Most people try and strive to uproot the weeds of unpleasant memories. This is not possible as selective amnesia is still in the domain of science fiction. The memories will remain and one needs to let them be. It is far more important not to be reactive about the long buried past and to not use that as a scale to measure oneself.
The past should never be empowered to affect the present. Passing a verdict about oneself based entirely on past events deals a body blow to growth and development. Every event is the outcome of a host of complex factors most of which are not entirely predictable or controllable. The possibility thinker is positive and has faith in himself believing that any dream is possible. The probability thinker, in contrast, is a sceptical individual teeming with self-doubt and fearing the probability of failure.
A farmer had a couple of horses that he used for tilling his land. They would be tied the whole day to plough the field or draw water from the well to irrigate the fields. At night the farmer would leave the rope tied round their necks but never bothered to tie the other end. It was free An onlooker enquired “Why don’t you tie the other end? Won’t the animal run away?”
The farmer replied “The end around their necks is enough to make them believe that they are captive. They are convinced that the other end is secured."
Carrying excess emotional baggage does not augur well; it could affect your self-esteem. You might get convinced that you are at the root of all the misfortunes that have befallen you and will mope and indulge in an unforgiving criticism of yourself. The already low levels of self esteem could ebb further and make you cynical. Embers of unpleasant memories get fanned by self-pity and self-criticism and so the flame of sorrow is kept alive. It is akin to being a jury at one’s own trial and about being obsessive about fixing the blame rather than the problem.
Moving on with life after an unsavoury incident requires one to view it as just one among many events and incidents in one’s life. Que sera sera -- whatever will be will be. Reminiscing and reacting to the past is as futile as attempting to resuscitate a corpse. Most people try and strive to uproot the weeds of unpleasant memories. This is not possible as selective amnesia is still in the domain of science fiction. The memories will remain and one needs to let them be. It is far more important not to be reactive about the long buried past and to not use that as a scale to measure oneself.
The past should never be empowered to affect the present. Passing a verdict about oneself based entirely on past events deals a body blow to growth and development. Every event is the outcome of a host of complex factors most of which are not entirely predictable or controllable. The possibility thinker is positive and has faith in himself believing that any dream is possible. The probability thinker, in contrast, is a sceptical individual teeming with self-doubt and fearing the probability of failure.
A farmer had a couple of horses that he used for tilling his land. They would be tied the whole day to plough the field or draw water from the well to irrigate the fields. At night the farmer would leave the rope tied round their necks but never bothered to tie the other end. It was free An onlooker enquired “Why don’t you tie the other end? Won’t the animal run away?”
The farmer replied “The end around their necks is enough to make them believe that they are captive. They are convinced that the other end is secured."
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